Dear Mom Who Was In Tears Today

I bent down and looked into the refrigerator.  Everyone had already eaten without me, and the kids had already put the food away as they began their kitchen clean-up routine.  (Lest you be jealous that my kids were cleaning the kitchen for me — don't.  This is simply the training stage right now.  You can be jealous in a couple years when it's actually clean after they've cleaned it.  But hey, they're learning.)

I was so hungry.  My blood sugar was way too low and I was shaking.  I try to be very good about keeping myself fed, but today had just been one of those days where I couldn't seem to get the timing right.  Every time I tried to get a bite to eat, my precious little 7 week old decided it was her turn to eat first.

I hadn't felt very productive with the housework that day either.  She just needed a lot more attention than usual – probably going through a growth spurt – plus there was the usual grind of life with all the other kids.

As I dug through the refrigerator to figure out which container held the remainder of dinner, hoping that they had even saved me any, my hands were shaking so badly that I was dropping things on the floor.  I needed to eat – NOW – but it didn't seem like it would be an easy feat to get my food served up without creating an even bigger mess in the kitchen as I dropped food and dishes.

In an instant, tears welled up in my eyes and spilled down my cheeks.  The hunger of the moment and the weariness of the day had finally gotten to me.

As I stood up and closed the refrigerator, what should be staring me in the face but a little magnet containing a Scripture verse that was exactly what I needed to see in that moment!

“They that sow in tears shall reap in joy.”  (Psalm 126:5)

I caught my breath, in awe that God should encourage me with a verse about tears just as my own tears had begun to flow.

It seemed such a pathetic, unimportant thing that I should be in tears over being hungry and tired.

But God cared.

In another instant, another verse came to mind:

“And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not.” (Galatians 6:9)

That encouragement from God's Word gave me more energy than the food I consumed a few minutes later.

God gave me such a timely reminder that the daily grind of motherhood is worth it!  In due season
I will reap the harvest of all these days of hard work.

The sacrifice of my time and effort, and yes, even of a meal on occassion, will be rewarded with the pleasure of knowing my children have experienced a lifetime of learning about the love of the Savior both through my words and my actions.

So, dear mama who was in tears today, remember this:

 They that sow in tears shall reap in joy.

The Secret to Becoming a Less Grouchy Mom

The morning started out nicely enough.  I got up early, read my Bible, and then sent out an email about how things are going a lot more smoothly now that we're getting to bed earlier and we are getting into a good morning routine.

We finished up breakfast and tidied up the house, then got started on homeschooling for the day.  Sounds like we have the perfect little family, doesn't it?

But 5 minutes into the school day, things changed a little bit.

The table was covered in piles of stuffed animals that the kids thought should join them.  I couldn't think with the mess.  One seat is vacant because a child had already had a melt-down and was in her room until she could calm down.

The toddler was sitting on the table, and I was shushing her every few minutes so I could teach.

Thankfully the baby was being a sweetheart (she's such a good baby!), but it wasn't long after this that I had to excuse myself to take care of her blowout diaper.

The rest of the day never did get quite back on track.

There were more melt-downs.  There were attitudes.  There was a toddler potty-training accident and a bunch of toilet paper shoved down the bathroom sink drain. (I'm sure that will make my husband's day better when he arrives home from work.)  There was an impromptu bath after the accident and another accident (of the grosser variety) while she was in the bathtub.

There were interruptions and inconveniences galore.

But I didn't have a horrible day.

Now, I want to be careful with this next part because I don't want to sound all pious and like I'm little miss perfect who always has a great attitude.

Because I don't.

But, the reason I didn't have a horrible day is that I'm learning (ever so slowly) a very important lesson that is greatly helping me as I persevere through this season of motherhood.

I'm learning the lesson of expectation.

I've come to realize that my expectations of motherhood started out all wrong.  I spent a lot of time frustrated because things weren't working out like I thought they should.

I felt like the house should stay tidy all the time, the children should be sweet, and we should cuddle up and read books all day.

Anything outside of that ideal was, in my mind, a deviation from the norm and needed to be rectified as soon as possible.

A potty training accident?  What an inconvenience!  Sigh.
A melt-down?  Are you serious? Child, do you know how much I'd like to be snuggling with you right now with a book?  But I can't because you are interrupting the flow of our day!

But over time, I've come to realize a simple, yet life-changing truth.

Life isn't perfect.

Imperfection is the norm. And any day that ends uneventfully is actually the deviation from the norm.

Once I figured that out, I started to take things like having toilet paper shoved down the sink with a lot more grace and a lot fewer sighs.

Don't get me wrong.  I'm not saying I like it when those things happen.  And I'm not saying we should just run our homes with a whatever-goes attitude without having guidelines in place to keep things flowing as smoothly as possible.

But…messes and kids just go hand in hand.

Motherhood is hard work, plain and simple.

In fact, there are way more “hard work” moments than there are commercial-worthy, happy, cuddly family moments.

Are the feel good moments worth every ounce of hard work that I put in every day?  A thousand times yes.

But I need to remember to expect the hard work rather than treating it as an annoying obstacle to the feel good moments.

The messes are going to be there.  The inconveniences.  The exhaustion.

And it's okay, because that's what life with kids is all about.

It's about loving them no matter what.
It's about being grateful for each moment I get to spend with them, whether that be disinfecting a filthy bathroom floor or snuggling up with a book.

Expect it, mama.

Expect to be tired.

Expect to work hard.

Expect life to be imperfect.

And when those chaotic moments come your way, they'll no longer seem like an inconvenience or a reason for a panic attack.  They'll just be another part of your messy, yet beautiful life.

Our Stay at Gatlinburg Falls Resort

This year has been so busy and stressful for our family, and we really needed some time to get away and just be together with no other distractions.

We could not have been happier with our accommodations in Gatlinburg, Tennessee!

The quiet setting was just what we needed to focus on spending time together and unwinding from some of the stress we'd been under.

Special thanks to Gatlinburg Falls Resort for providing a cabin for us in exchange for this review.

The location

Gatlinburg Falls Resort is just a few minutes away from the main part of Gatlinburg.  It was nice to be able to drive out to the cabin and feel like we had “gotten away from it all”, yet be super close to food or other activities when we felt so inclined.

We also drove into Pigeon Forge a few times during our stay since it was only about half an hour away and there are tons of activities to do there too.

The Cabin

The cabin we stayed in was perfect for our large family (if you consider 4 little ones and a baby a large family – most people seem to!)

The only thing that would have been nicer is if it had more property where the kids could have gone outside.  However, the inside of the cabin was so large that the kids didn't have any problem with “cabin fever” while we were there.  They had plenty of room not to feel cooped up inside, plus the arcade games kept them well occupied!

When we arrived, we found that there was a large stack of coupons provided for area attractions.

Having a large kitchen made my part of the vacation so nice!  We saved a lot of money by bringing our own groceries and doing most of the cooking at the cabin rather than going out.  The kitchen was well stocked with everything I needed to prepare healthy food for lots of hungry mouths.

The upstairs also had a living room, master bedroom, and master bathroom.

This was the view from the master  bedroom deck!  It was sooo relaxing to wake up and go sit out on our porch and look at this every morning!

The downstairs had another bedroom, a separate bathroom for the kids, and a large game area.  This is where the kids spent most of their time (of course!)

Also, not pictured is the hot tub out on the downstairs deck.  I forgot to get a picture of it because we were too busy enjoying it!

Our Overall Impression

We are a pretty laid back family who prefers our vacations to be slow-paced.  We don't need to run around to a million attractions and restaurants, though we enjoy having options available to us.

Our family's personality made Gatlinburg Falls Resort the perfect location for us to spend time as a family.  We could spend lots of time just hanging out at the cabin doing pretty much nothing.  It was bliss!

Yet we were close enough to both Gatlinburg and Pigeon Forge to eat out a few times and do a few activities together (like riding Go-Karts!)

We found everything in the cabin to be clean and in good working order.

The staff in the office were helpful when we needed extra linens.

I can't think of any problems that we had during our stay; everything was taken care of for us.

Although we were provided with a complimentary stay, my husband and I were both impressed with the prices listed on the website.

When you follow their Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram feeds you can see that they often have 50% off or buy one get one free specials, which is an awesome deal!

I hope our review has given you a good idea of where your family might stay next time you're looking for a family friendly vacation spot!

A Stroller For a Growing Family (Evenflo Sibby Review)

This post was sponsored by Evenflo as part of an Influencer Activation for Influence Central. I received the Evenflo Sibby Travel System to facilitate my review.

Most of you know that we recently added another member to our family.  Now that I'm a mom of 5 children, I feel like I have a pretty good idea of what gear you need when you have a lot of young children!

In my opinion, a travel system is a must!  There is always need for a stroller for the baby, and when you have a toddler in the mix, it's nice to be able to let both of them ride.

When I was given the opportunity to review the Evenflo Sibby Travel System, I was really excited to check it out.

At first glance, the thing that interested me the most was that it had space for both the baby and toddler to ride, yet it wouldn't take up nearly as much room in my trunk as a double stroller.

Other things I like about the Evenflo Sibby Travel System:

• Gender neutral, classic fabric
  I thought the gray denim-like color was nice.  Being a mom of multiple children, I really prefer a gender neutral fabric so that I can use the stroller and car seat over and over no matter what gender subsequent children are.  It's also really nice to have something that is not too trendy so that it won't look weird in a few years.  Although it has a denim look to it, the fabrice is actually very light and breathable. (There are other colors of fabric available as well.)
• Comfortable handle height
  This is another important feature in a stroller.  You don't want to be stooped over as you push your little one around!
• Smooth ride
  I was very pleased with how smoothly the stroller rides and how easily the wheels swivel.  I have used some strollers that are honestly hard to steer.  It's embarrassing to be running a stroller into things because you can't get it to go where you want it to go!  I didn't have any problems at all with the Evenflo Sibby.
• Large storage basket
  This is another must when you are a mom of multilple children.  The amount of things you need to have with you requires a lot of space!  I was happy with how large the basket under the Evenflo Sibby was.
• Easy to adjust the seat up and down
  Depending on which child is riding in the stroller, I need to adjust the seat frequently.  A younger baby would be lying down more often, while a toddler will usually want to sit up but may get tired and need to  lie back too.  Just a quick pull on the cord on the back easily allows me to adjust the seat wherever it is needed.
• Large canopy
  I really love having so much shade over my child when we're out in the sun.  If I'm using the car seat with the stroller, I can completely cover the baby by using the canopy from both the stroller and the car seat combined.

What I'd like a little better:

• Canopy does not adjust easily
  The canopy does not pull up and down very easily.  You have to wrestle with it a little bit to get it to go where you want it to go.  This gets old really quick.
• Ride Along Board should be larger
  If the baby is lying back, there is no room at all for my toddler to ride.  Even with the stroller seat adjusted up, there is not much room at all for her to stand.  I think the ride along board should extend out a little further so that there is plenty of room to ride.

The Evenflo Sibby Travel System is available at Target.  You can check it out and watch a short video here.

One Simple Way to Bring More Peace Into Your Home

“Something's got to change.  Something has to change NOW.”

I was completely overwhelmed and defeated as a mother.

Oh, sure, I had made a lot of changes in my mindset and overall I was happier and less stressed.

But things at home were still not flowing terribly smoothly.

A lot of that stemmed from my battling of chronic fatigue and other health issues (more on that in another post) and the fact that we just could not get into a routine because of it.  Some days I'd be up well before the kids, some days found me sleeping until embarrassingly late hours of the morning because my body was too weak and tired to get up any earlier.

4 kids and a sleeping-in mother DO NOT mix well, let me tell you.  They could get breakfast for themselves, but they sure couldn't clean it up very well.  🙂

We managed to get a lot of the chaos under control by instituting a rule that no one was allowed to come out of their rooms until mommy was up.  For the most part they obeyed (other than the toddler who would just come snuggle with me and I sure didn't mind that.)

But regardless, on the days where I slept late we all felt behind all day.  It was frustrating to both me and the kids.  I tried so hard to get up earlier because I knew that it would reduce a lot of my stress and in the long run help me to feel better.  (Reducing stress is a huge component of battling chronic fatigue.)

Step number one in that process was to focus on an earlier bedtime for the kids.  They were often up late because we started our day late, which then pushed every activity of the day back by a couple hours, which pushed bedtime back way too far, which kept me up late, which exhausted me and stressed me out, which left me with that “I've-been-run-over-by-a-truck” feeling the next morning, continuing the vicious cycle.

I'm learning that the biggest changes come when I learn to focus on one small thing.

So getting consistent with bedtime was my first “small thing.”  And it had a domino effect.  The earlier bedtime allowed me to be more rested, which helped me start getting up earlier, which helped me stay on top of my days better, which helped me to have the kids ready for bed earlier, which reduced a ton of stress, which made me feel more rested, which continued that positive cycle.

And all I had to do was one simple thing.

It made such a drastic difference that I was telling all my mom friends about it when they would talk about how exhausted they were or how stressed they were.

They probably thought I was weird, because don't most moms put their kids to bed at a normal, decent hour?  But I wasn't doing that.  So I figured that even if most moms have the bedtime thing down, there are probably some that don't.

We still don't have the bedtime thing down perfectly.  Things happen.  But when we get off track, I go right back to shooting for that early bedtime the next night.

In the beginning, I literally had to focus on bedtime all day long.  The focus of the entire day was on how I could get everyone in bed on time.

And it was great!

By focusing on one thing, my organizational skills improved in so many other areas as a natural result.  I got meals served in a timely manner because I knew that a late supper would mean a late kitchen cleanup and a late bedtime (or no kitchen cleanup if it got to be too late which would definitely increase the stress of the next day!) I got baths given and laundry put away sooner rather than later so it could be done before the kids went to bed.  This one focus area affected so many other things, but yet I didn't feel like it went against my naturally disorganized personality because I wasn't trying to think about a bunch of stuff every day.  I only had to be good at one thing, but it automatically made me good at other stuff.

(Full disclosure here: by the phrase “good at”, I really mean, “a lot better than I used to be, but still not even close to perfect.”)

Once I had the earlier bedtime down fairly well, I began to work on a morning routine for all of us.  I knew I needed something that would work regardless of what time we got up in the morning.

And I have been SO PLEASED with how things are going.  (Here is an update on the Morning Routine for Kids that Changed Our Days.)

We still have a lot of progress to make in our pursuit of smoothly flowing days.  And I realize that with a bunch of little kids, “smoothly flowing” is always going to be a pretty relative term.  But I can handle the hiccups with a lot less agitation now that everyone knows where they're supposed to be and what they're supposed to be doing.

Here's the really cool thing: this concept works no matter what your “one thing” is. For me, it was getting the kids to bed earlier. For you, maybe it's getting yourself to bed earlier. Maybe it's preparing your dinner first thing in the morning. Maybe something else entirely. But the key is to choose one simple thing to focus on that will have a domino effect on many other aspects of your day.

I've created a workbook that will guide you through the process of finding the thing that you need to tweak for your unique situation. Check out 7 Days to Calm for easy-to-follow instructions that will help you figure out how to eliminate the chaos in your own home.

I understand what it's like to feel like life is never-ending chaos.

It's depressing.  Boy, do I know.

I'm so thankful the Lord has given wisdom and help to come up with simple solutions that even someone as disorganized as I am could implement.

Friend, if you're struggling through that vicious cycle of staying up late, being tired and grouchy, feeling behind all day long, and going to bed late yet again, can I encourage you to not be afraid of the simplest solution?

Can I encourage you to focus on just one thing?

For me it was the earlier bedtime for the kids.  For you, that may be preparing supper first thing in the day because it will in turn reduce the evening chaos.  It may be something else.  But pinpoint one small thing.  Stop trying to fix your whole life all in one shot, and just narrow it down to one thing.

You may be surprised how much of a difference it will make in your home.

I've been a mess for so long, and I know how miserable it is.  I also know how relieving it is when the tornado-like winds start slowing down.

If you're still in the middle of the chaos, I want you to feel that relief.  If I can find a little calm amidst the chaos, I think anybody can!

How I Get My Kids to Actually Stay Quiet During Afternoon Quiet Time

I am unashamedly an introvert mom.

That means I start getting a bit jittery in the afternoons.  I have to have some quiet time without the constant “kid noise” in the background or I struggle to be sweet.  I need some time to recharge my batteries so I can head into the evening calm and collected.

But the big question is:

How do I implement a quiet time for the kids that is actually quiet?

Usually I have the smallest ones take a nap while the older ones read in their rooms.
But often the ones who are not required to take naps will come out of their room approximately 800 times, thus ensuring that quiet time is not exactly relaxing for mama.  They need a snack or have to go to the bathroom or have to tattle on a sibling about something.

Enter my latest lifesaver: Jonathan Park Audio Adventures

Jonathan Park audio adventures are so engaging for my kids that they don't want to get up from quiet time because they'll miss what happens next!

My oldest son (age 8) has been especially engrossed in the adventures.  He talks about them non-stop and asks me several times a day if he may listen to the next episode.  He's always trying to guess what is going to happen as he scours the descriptions on the backs of the cases to see if he can catch onto any clues about the next episode.

Why Mom Loves Jonathan Park Audio Adventures:

1. Character building – my children are being encouraged through the example of their “peers” on the audios to develop numerous Godly character traits such as perseverance, selflessness, courage, and more!
2. Teaches Biblical Creationism – a child may not be interested in a big term like “Apologetics”, but that is exactly what my children are learning through these exciting stories!  They're not only learning the truth about our world and its Creator; they're learning how to defend that truth!
3. All while keeping the kids quietly occupied! (And mom might secretly enjoy hearing the stories too when she's not busy catching a nap!)

What my kids think of Jonathan Park Audio Adventures:

I like it best when we get to the exciting parts where I wonder, “What's going to happen next?!!” -K. age 6

And I already mentioned how often my 8-year-old talks about the stories and how he asks several times a day if he may listen to the next episode.  With a strongly distractable personality, the fact that he can sit still for an entire afternoon with his attention captivated by the stories is impressive! (Even if he does sit on my kitchen counters so he can be right next to the CD player!)

As he saw me composing this blog post, he said, “That's how you keep us quiet?”  “Yes,”  I answered.  “It works!”

“Well, I like Jonathan Park!  I'm going to save my money so I can buy another set!”

What are the adventures like?

Well…why don't you decide?  Listen below to a trailer!  The level of excitement you hear is exactly how the adventures are the entire way through!

Who are Jonathan Park Audio Adventures for?

The adventures were specifically designed for ages 7-13, although younger children all the way through adults will enjoy them!

Are you ready to bless your family with highly entertaining, faith-building audio adventures?
Click here to get your first Series Pack 1 – over five hours of action-packed fun that will equip, educate, and unlock your kids’ imaginations!!

Disclosure: I received product and/or payment to facilitate this review.  As always, I only feature products our family personally uses and loves to share with my readers!